This self portrait marks the beginning of a 30 day series: being seen at 50.
The inspiration came from a 3am epiphany last night. I was doing my usual insomnia blah, blah, blah about what wasn’t working in my life. Suddenly I popped out of feeling sorry for myself and saw so clearly how much negative cultural baggage about female aging had seeped into my thinking since turning 50. Any amount is too much of course, but I became crystal clear that the tone and harshness buzzing in the background of my inner conversation is recent and something I want to stop.
Now.
Granting this judgmental conversation space in my psyche, how ever faint it may seem and how ever much I don’t “really” believe it, makes me invisible to myself. It becomes the infection that erodes the foundation of my sense of self, my power, and sacred connection and creativity.
It does the same to you when you entertain the limits the culture sets for how you should be, look, and have.
This is mean and dangerous to the core of our inner truth.
So I got the inspiration for “being seen at 50.” Part art project, part self declaration, part truth telling, where I will see myself though posting self portraits, and see myself being seen as other see the portraits. I will post, if not each day at least several times a week for the next month. I know, I know, the world does not need yet another “selfie” gallery, but I am doing it anyway!
Because, on wiser thought that is EXACTLY what the world needs!
Women owning our age, our looks, our being, our space, our visibility! The world needs to see us and we need to see each other. As we are. In our life, being with it all when it is not all shiny and when it is all shiny. Revolution happens in embracing being seen, especially, and if only, by ourselves. At 50, at 62, at 37, at all of our ages.
It is a bit embarrassing letting you see this piece of my shadow, but no shadow can exist in the light. So for the next month my humble little red point and shoot camera be the light that lets me be seen by me and by you, in this new way.
I am not sure of how it all will unfold. I want this project to have its own organic flow. What I do know is I will each post will picture most likely with some words, maybe many. But maybe no words sometimes. Beyond that, my intention is to stay open, curious, and be seen. All 50 years of me.
Will you join me in your own way? Take self portraits, greet yourself in the mirror with kindness, leave your creative mark someplace new where you can see it. It matters less what you do than that you allow yourself to deeply see YOU. To stop looking for how ever long you can for the culturally dictated facade of you you may think you need.
If you want to join me, let me know. Send me a message, I’d love to hear from you.
We are evolving creatures of beauty. We deserve to be seen by ourselves as such.
